'resolutioners'

         I think, whether we're prone to writing down concrete resolutions or not, we are all apt to reflect on what we can change in our lives when a new year rings in. I am no exception and while I don't set much store in a full life turn-around occurring with an arbitrary date, I see no harm in using it as a time for a fresh start. With my finals schedule ending blessedly early, I've actually had quite a long holiday break and as it comes to a close it finds me fairly restless. Tomorrow my long lazy days come to an end when my father drives back to my city to cart me around to grab groceries to stock my cupboards and see me frenziedly clean my apartment. But I'm looking forward to it. Without the structure of work or school I end up left to my devices for too long and I get restless and idle. My muscles are stiff because my crazy prior semester saw me abandon my yoga and regular gym schedule. I'm a little more tired from heavy holiday foods and little to no coffee. So, naturally, finding myself a little shriveled and tired from too much free time I find myself planning on little things I plan on getting back to with my winter semester just around the corner. 

~

          My physical health needs to take a priority again. Between not eating enough and finding time to get my heart pumping and muscles burning I lost a lot of muscle and flexibility and I definitely didn't sleep as well as I did in months prior. I miss my muscle-ly legs and ability to hoist myself into headstands. My skin has been suffering as well, drying out with another cold atlantic winter sweeping in. So I have planned for early rises to get in gym time with my jam-packed schedule. Food wise I want to cut back on processed food and and try eating close to plant-based and continue to keep caffeine to a minimum. Skin wise I'm going to revamp my whole routine and find a new evening ritual to get my skin back to glowing.

~

          My mental health also deserves to be taken care of a little more in the new year. Just being a generally anxious person than most I need to absolutely make the time to cut off screen time in the evenings and have a restful night-time routine in place where I can light a candle, grab a cup of calming tea and write down my reflections of each day. Being naturally introverted means I am apt to bottle things up and carrying everything doesn't allow for mental clarity. I also pledge to myself that if it turns that I cannot seem to do my mental health justice on my own, I'll make the time to turn to a professional.
        Another mantra I plan to live with this year is the idea that while connecting with people is something I love doing, since I am pretty social, it doesn't mean that everyone deserves a seat at the table of my life. I tend to be very quick to invest emotional energy into other people rather than knowing the limits of my psyche and often expend too much into being a doormat to other people at the expense of my own worries. I often feel a lot of guilt there because I often feel obligated to put myself out there for other people in every possible way but I need a gentle reminder that saying 'no' when I need to and picking and choosing where I invest myself doesn't make me a bad person, just one with priorities. This year is about choosing the things that are best for me and bring my dreams forward, rather than being dishonest with myself and others. Doubting my gut and intuitions and my own abilities to achieve my dreams doesn't do anyone any favours, myself especially.

~

             Lastly my financial standing is also going to become a priority. The plan is to pick up a part time job and be a 'real' adult and open a savings account. I do in fact have student loans but they only really cover the cost of living. I'm tired of having to overly plan ahead for social events or dating, or things like studying abroad taking an absolute back burner to my bills. It sounds like a simple goal but focusing more on becoming independent and finding new ways to take care of myself is something that is important to me. 

            So my goals are few but they entail a lot more smaller tasks and organizing than I wanted to lay out here. Something about writing it down always makes the possibility of success more real, somehow. I hope the new year finds you in good stead.

xx. r

melancholia

          I find myself in a quiet moment between the hustle in getting ready for term to start again (only 2 more days, good lord) and as always, I'm wrapped up in a lot of nostalgia and apprehensive feelings.
There are aspects to this that are old hat now; the trek to go pay tuition, familiar bus stops and the enjoyment of grocery shopping on my own, not to mention the more aesthetically pleasing and quirky views of my new neighborhood. The more things change the more they stay the same, however. Looking back on each move I've made, marked by the end of each academic year, I really am struck by the fact that I'm in a much more radical space and mindset than I was a year, two years ago. Previous ponderings I had earlier the summer meant had me enthusiastic for the start of term and perhaps it's because           I've been floating free of the structure I'm used to or something else but I'm a little disenchanted with the reality of moving back to town again. My fault, of course, as I am prone to romanticism. But, it's this summerly move that throws light on the thoughts that I try to avoid. Chiefly, that I'm fearful that at some point home will stop feeling as such. Is it me that's changed or it? Maybe this is just the fact that I feel a bit like what I suppose a snake or lizard feels like in the process of shedding old skin. Awkward and peeling and then of course the new skins feels too tight. I'm not sure where my head is as of late. The fact is that I am also desperate to forget or acknowledge my 'old skin', not because I still want to be that person but I suppose I am afraid of forgetting or that the best parts of my former self, life, etc. will disappear and I won't know what to do. 

           I've read that oft piped phrase 'home is not a place' many times now and I don't if I fully agree. Perhaps yes, home is expressed and felt in certain ways and remembered in certain faces or things but in that same vein, it is a specific set of faces, a specific scent in the air, a specific bedroom and well walked tile floor and familiar trodden paths. I am afraid that I cannot take enough pictures or imprint certain angles of my parents garden and the trickling brook I grew up splashing in enough or that some winds of life will whisk me away too far that I can't ever go back to that slice of the ocean that I know as my own.

             I've been writing this post over the span of a couple days and with a good night's sleep and a fresh perspective my dramatic flair has calmed a bit. I know this is something always lurking in my mind but I think I need to find other ways of capturing this sense of home, whatever that may mean. Maybe it'll be through recipes, well worn through generations, or more memories from my mom, or calling my brothers more often. I know this is something I need to explore, I just need to figure out how. Today gave me a cold autumn rain and I'm enjoying packing my knapsack for classes and anticipating being back on a schedule again. Here's once again to new beginnings. 

xx.

r.

sea salt bath

       After predictions of further rain keeping everyone tentatively indoors all week (despite said rain not ever showing up) me, myself and I decided the glowing and calm evening that showed up could not be wasted and I tried in vain to get someone to go for a walk along with me. Alas, I could not and I ended up trotting along by myself. For a good hour, I ended up walking along the water front with a coffee and marveling (not for the last time in my life I'm sure), at the perfect golden glow the late evening sun cast over everything, giving foliage and fauna alike the most amazing back-lit golden glow. As I am wont to do when left to my own devices, I ended up sitting on the beach that faces the open harbor. It had been ages since I'd been on a walk here on my own and I'd forgotten how much the shush shush of water on rock calmed me. I can't even put into words the quality of August light in Newfoundland, you really just need to see it for yourself.  Toes curled in the surprisingly pleasant Atlantic, not a breeze in the air; it really is one of my happiest places. 

         
           Painting this tranquil scene leads my to the actual point of this post which is that any time spent solo by the seaside usually puts me to pondering. I'm generally a fairly introverted and solitary person and this summer has been no different. Not to say I'm not social, but I'm more than content to spend time alone. But having severed a few different connections over the past few months has brought some forced perspective, as it were. And, being around certain sights, sounds and and smells of home brings nostalgia to the surface of my mind. These mindsets paired made me poke around the corners of my mind and in a round about way I left the beach to continue my walk feeling more like my old self than I have in awhile.

          I shouldn't say old self, probably my more authentic self. As I've mentioned in other posts, a lot of adult life has left me feeling cynical, jaded. I often worry that things won't or can't inspire me in the same way they did when I was 16 and had nothing but ideas and daydreams ahead of me and to worry about minor responsibilities. I've garnered that over the past few years I've limited myself in a myriad of ways, which, while sad to acknowledge is also useful. People have complimented me a lot of different things through the years, my writing, voice, haircut, etc. And of course, I always say thank you but have I really meant it? Have I truly been taking to heart these commendations of these extensions of me? No, is my answer. 

          Beyond my own internal struggles, there really hasn't been anything truly stopping me from pursuing, molding and refining my skills and passions. If I was asked to wager as to why, I believe it's a toxic combination of laziness and perfectionism. I've never had the natural drive to chase after something to begin with, and, once I see someone else do 'it', be it art, writing, performing, what you will, I automatically think 'clearly there's no point trying now, since I'm not going to attain that level of skill'. As the oft quoted Roosevelt said: 'comparison is the thief of joy' and it's a point I need to be better at reminding myself of. Truly, I'm awful. Mostly because I have the ground work of opportunities many don't: access to post-secondary educations, good health, supportive parents, a great scene of cultural artists to admire and use as inspiration. Essentially I need to learn to stay in my own lane and do the best I can with what I have, whatever that may be. The other more brutal truth is that I needed the time to reflection and once again remember that no one else is going to do the work for me. No one else can go seize the day in the way that I want to but me. In reassessing the ways I would like to define myself, it's part of that contemplative process to regard the journey to these long term goals as worthy of me too. It's not a waste, since all my days regardless of how close or far I am to particular goal or dream, are well intention-ed and worth something to me.
                Of course, I can easily predict I'm going to have a bunch of off days in all of this, but I've purposefully set aside some time to focus on nurturing these parts of myself and really coming into my own in the way I deserve. Remembering that I read somewhere once 'be the version of yourself you needed and looked up to when you were 12' has helped. The dragon-loving, book-inhaling, ceaselessly inspired younger me wants to see future me write a book(s), poetry, travel, learn new languages, master yoga, cook like a pro and embrace good vibes all around.

xx.

r.

deep breathes

I woke up yesterday to a humid, torrential downpour of rain, a leak in my ceiling and a sense of frustration. Newfoundland isn't known for its hot weather, per say, but this July has been particularly cold and wet. I spent all day getting soaked walking back and forth from work and fussing over the leak and tripping over cabin feverish cats who weren't allowed out into the maelstrom of wind and rain. I had forgotten to get groceries and was approaching a very crabby mood when suddenly the rain ceased and sunshine started peaking through the overhanging clouds. 

I had meant to write on this a couple weeks ago when we had another rainy day which led me to a (if not particularly profound) calming realization. Just like yesterday, this day was was an absolute wreckage of wind and rain but later in the evening I went to let out my yowling cat and realized the storm had lifted.
I stepped outside and was struck by bright sunlight filtering through the remnant fog and sparkling water droplets illuminating everything with late evening sunshine. Sitting there with a warm wind breezing over me, I felt something in me relax. 

~

Again, while this may not be a new or particularly enlightened observation it was a reminder of how similar this storm so easily parallels our own struggles. Particularly with Newfoundland weather, which never starts or stops when it's predicted to, I find life is similar. Difficult times, perpetual funks and gloomy hearts seem to last forever, until they don't. One day you wake up breathing a little easier and can marvel at the sunshine again.

As someone who sees more fog than daylight in the run of a year, I always make a point to mentally tuck away these warm days and moments of intention for days when the rain does return. Observe particular things about these days to scribble down and press between book pages to touch on later. A myriad of birdsong coming from wet trees. The particular petrichor that rises from the earth. Water laden plants, dancing with droplets of water. Families of baby ducks enjoying all the new puddles. The feeling of stripping off damp clothes and making tea and changing into pajamas. How silvery wet fields of tall grass look from a distance. Drifting to sleep with drone of water on window pane.

Maybe I am romanticizing it but at least I can find things to be grateful about. Everything is until it's not. And I'd rather focus on small moments of positivity than try vainly to make the dismal moments move faster. It's a waste of time and energy. I think we need to trust ourselves more to do what we do best persevere. I was struck reading a post somewhere that was a gentle reminder that at the end of the day, you are the one who carries you through dark times. No matter how messy, you find a way to come out the other side. Lamenting over the irretrievable keeps one stuck and takes away from the fact that the only thing that we can rely on is things to change and time to continue marching forward. Write letters to your future self, hide compassionate notes for you to find at a later date, anything to remind you that you will not be miserable forever.  That with enough kindness and trust unto yourself, you will indeed get by.  

xx.

r.

transitioning is ugly

So, in typical Rachel fashion, some of the bigger events of my recent life had more meaning and brought to surface other thoughts and conflicts than I had realized.
Post-breakup and post-move, I realized I've crossed some sort of line. I mean of course, moving away from home and starting attending post secondary was a change but I still always had my safety nets and ties to home. The people I was with, the majority of my relationships even after I had moved were still people I had known growing up. So the change was change, but not extreme change.

Your twenties are tagged as the years you're 'figuring yourself' and I can agree with that. It's also messy and embarrassing a lot of the time because you're still at that point where you still don't have the experience under your belt to ~know stuff~ so, for me anyways, I find it is so damnably  hard to work past the bad moments to focus on the better parts of the person I'm becoming. It's not often that twenty year olds gets reminded of that.
So many of my peers and I get consumed with school, work, relationships, holding ourselves up to whatever bar we've set and that's what life becomes about. Of course, you have to hustle to succeed in whatever it is you're pursuing but I feel there's a certain cynicism, or depression that tempers it and not in a good way.

I was browsing tumblr (yes, as always) and a lovely picture of this bright, white homey looking flat appeared on my dash. My instantaneous thought was "At one point in my life, I wouldn't be afraid to dream and strive to have something like this." Yes, it was something a shallow as a nice apartment but the statement is still true. When I was 16, the world was full of possibility, as it is for all naive 16 year olds and I was comfortable wanting certain dreams. After a couple heartbreaks, losing connections, and transitioning to an adult world with responsibilities I didn't have at that age, I feel I've become a bit jaded.  Admittedly a lot of these life experiences have worn me out. I'm not scared to admit that I'm not quite where I pictured.
This is coming off very maudlin, I'm sure. This isn't to say there haven't been moments of laughter and happiness, not at all, just currently my 'big picture' feels off, and I want to change that. I'm not really sure how but I know it needs to happen. The zeal I had for life, the optimism and  confidence I had in myself is not what it was and I miss that part of myself. I miss feeling like my place in the world is and was completely legitimate and that I contribute by being me. It starts by being brave and trusting that things will work out. This is not to excuse that I won't put in the work when it's necessary or that I'm going to unaccountable for myself but I need to accept that while there are things that are ultimately out of my control, I will be okay.

xx

r.

on retaining that spark

A day to day issue of mine arises as I often (admittedly mindlessly) scroll through tumblr. Do I commit to keepin' up dat' on point aesthetic by solely reblogging art pieces and muffled photography, or can I succumb to being a fangirl and reblog Twin Peaks graphics and gut-busting vines?
This originates from a very specific space within me. I grew up being that kid immersed in books and subsequently their fantasy world. I went through a phase where I passionately believed dragons were real and searched for them in my wee sea side town. I think mostly that came from not fitting in at all and needing, as books are wont to provide, an escape.
But I won't lie, and more specifically don't want to lie a small part of me is still that little girl who saved up to buy a fur trimmed cape; I want dragons to be real. 
Part of me is still retaining that hope that one day I'm going to wake up to the news and there's going be some kick-ass discovery and it will blow me out of the water. I will be that fantasy-obsessed dork forever.

Reflecting again on my younger self, I was so passionately into anything and everything that really spoke to me. But I also recall teasing, some of it intended in a kind way but I still remember being embarrassed. I feel that now at 20 that a lot of my peers would rather give off this aloof, distanced self and I feel like we don't allow ourselves to be as enthusiastic about the things that spin our cogs like we did when we were children. And that we're restricted to things that are "cultured". This may be a one-sided observation on my part as I'll admit I haven't met the whole of my student body/peer group but I just general feel the divide myself. I guess that's what I mean by that 'spark'. There's this distinct pigeon-holing I feel, especially at university, that I can't both engage in something 'sophisticated' like feminist discourse and then go home and lose my shit over the new Hannibal teaser trailers or re-listen to Hilary Duff and unashamedly sing along to Come Clean because, hey, that was my mid-2000's anthem, dammit.  That I can't both cultivate my mind with more complex books and art, and become more socially aware but also watch dumb vines at 1:00 in the morning and cry laughing, heaving silently.  
I want to resist this because I feel it contributes to that type of person who will sneer at parties or in general conversation when you show a shade of zeal for things that aren't that trendy, young-adult shit. Oh gee, let me just rush to join that "I think I'm too good for pop culture" band wagon. I'm going to ride my cart down the grocery aisle when no one's looking. I'm also occasionally going to re-read the books that kept me going at 12 and relish in the characters and their ability to enter realms and fight beasties. I'll happily have the occasional one-person dance party to One Direction.

I don't want this to come across as self-congratulatory or even that I'm a ~special snowflake~ for observing this fact but I wanted to reflect on this aspect of myself since I'd never really archived these particular thoughts anywhere before.  My only hope is that I just want to make sure I never get to a point where I think that I'm too good for the things once inspired me or that I ever sneer or belittle the interests of others, so long as they're not problematic (bronies anyone?)

  xx.
r

On Breaking Up

not mine; credit to artist

After a year and eight months together, my boyfriend and I mutually decided that we were no longer heading in the same direction and connecting in the same way and then, I was single. Simple and yet wholly complicated all in the one go.  
I am in the process of trying to be kind to myself and healing. 

I wanted to use this space to kind of reflect and share what I've been using in this process to see it as growth and a new beginning. All endings and all goodbyes are difficult no matter what way you try to package it.

i. allow yourself to mourn - I assume that no matter how short or long your relationship was, there was an initial reason you were in it and a bunch of good memories that you still have. Allow yourself to recognize that this is the best decision for your long term self but that your present mind and heart should be allowed to be upset and cry and be angry or deal with this transition in whatever way. 

ii. don't lose yourself to grief - While in the process of grieving do not lose sight of the long term; I suggest giving yourself a deadline. Comfort food and living in your pajamas or succumbing to whatever vices it is that one has only feels good for a short period of time. Don't let that drag out. 

iii. keep the chattiness to a minimum - Use your support systems by all means, but airing your dirty laundry to any joe who will listen is not only disrespectful to the relationship you had but it could come back to bite you in the ass. It's a natural response to want to find life boats in hard times but pick and chose who knows the details.

iv. pick up yoga - This is a specific suggestion from yours truly. I finished my practice this morning with the intention of self love and felt very restored and peaceful at the end of it. This might not be your cup of tea, but I suggest trying it. Just physically being in touch with your body and inner self and acknowledging your feelings is healthy.

Not mine; credit to artist

v. write - for some it'll be a big temptation to keep stringing out contact with your ex but unless you absolutely have to, don't. Give at minimum 60 days. In the mean time, start journaling. Vent those feelings, write impassioned and angry letters to your former partner. Not all these thoughts need to actually be voiced to anyone but again, acknowledge them. 

vi. make new goals - Whenever one comes to you writer it down. I don't care if it's some small habit you've been meaning to instill in your daily life or jet setting off  to Amsterdam, writer them down. Focus on yourself and the person you were and are before you were part of a unit. You're still that person and try to see this as a time of nurturing and tending to your goals and interest. 

vii.  find new things to focus on - It's a weird feeling to realize that a lot of your music and shows and foods were shared and associated with your partner, so that you try to sit down and watch Better Call Saul and are only plagued with memories. Compile a list of new shows to watch, and better books to read and new routines to form. I'm not trying to beat a dead horse but remember you were single at other points in your life and still enjoyed all sorts of things all on your own. Come back to these shows and songs when you're ready.

vii. don't rebound - I honestly don't care how attractive your new...attraction is: it's not worth it. Even if you don't think your breakup was particularly messy it's probably not a good idea to inflict/invest yourself in another person just yet. I know that it's tempting to find another source of affection but really, take this time to focus on loving yourself and being comfortable alone first.

other ideas: ¨ buy new underwear ¨ on that note, maybe buy new sheets ¨ rearrange your room and change its decor ¨ pet an animal ¨ prioritize your physical health ¨ if you're feeling blue a little too frequently, start having kick-ass one person dance parties ¨ get in touch with nature and take a long walk, swim or hike ¨ buy a little trinket and 'marry' yourself, with some self-love vows ¨ invest in a new perfume/signature scent ¨ create a new project to invest your time in ¨ look into EFT tapping ¨ for the love of god, avoid stalking them on social media ¨ don't seek revenge-sex with their friends, just don't (buy a sex toy instead) ¨ allow yourself to cry and/or scream when you need to

That's all for now babes, hopefully you're all doing wonderful and that you'll see more of me here now that uni is out for summer break - lots of light and love.

r.

Weekly Musings #6: february blues

Hello again - a valiant effort to stay on track this evening with my review failed miserably since I wanted so awfully to touch base here and kind of just do a round up of the stuff that's been going on in my life recently. February hasn't been what I'll call overly kind to me so far, so it's living up to its cliche, one would suppose. Nothing in particular coming up on the horizon and its just felt a little down in general what with the butt-tonne of snow and lots of school work. To try and counteract these gloomy moments, I've been trying to actively write down or point out the more positive things that have happened thus far.

David's Tea strawberry rhubarb parfait // slippers at home for midterm break // bus stop loveliness // vegetarian meal prep

Midterm break-breather: Such as it always happens with me, I dip suddenly after a few weeks/month of being back at school. I know I've touched on how important home/family is to me a few times here and I doubt I'll stop bringing it up. A few days back around the blustery ocean to play scrabble and drink wine with my parents and sister was lovely. And catching up on sleep and work without feeling completely bogged down did wonders for my general sense of peace and mental clarity. Plus, time with my lovely cats is something I can never say no to. 

Contemplation: This one is vague and kind of abstract I'll admit, but I've just generally found the "noise" in my head is less of a flurry and more something I can actually manage and actually process recently. Of course, more often than not it's still all kind of overwhelming and harried, but I've been finding I've been having more clear days than anything else. Even if whatever I'm contemplating isn't the most lovely thought to be thinking, at least I'm being honest with myself, and that does a lot for my mental health in the long run.

homemade waffles (midterm break)

Honorable mentions: ● trying out new ideas for my weekly meal prep and having them be insanely delicious ● peppermint coffee ● finding long forgotten favorite novels ● new pillows ● toast with peanut butter and honey ● finding the time to actually do my makeup nicely and feeling like a total fox ● the lovely people I volunteer with ● safe spaces for critical debates and feminist fun ● prioritizing my yoga practice again and it not being about anyone but me ● a tidy bedroom ● getting into watching the old Twilight Zone ● earplugs (hallelujah) ● successful new note-taking methods ● days that feel like spring ● anticipation for treating myself to a new piercing ● more anticipation for an upcoming performance ● feeling in touch with music again  ● OPI's "love is hot and coal"; such a rad nail colour ● compliments on my Blundstones from a bus driver ● Binge watching How To Get Away With Murder

Link love: ● Someone please buy me these stunning white cat-eye shades for spring? (!!)

● Holla' at me for Valentino's Pre-Fall 2015 collection because oh my god, my obsession with astrology is soaring to new heights. (The capeeesss)
● I've also finally found a way I really enjoy eating salmon, so I'm telling you all to go try this now.

That's all from your slightly forlorn blogger for now, folks; back to the books - has February likewise gotten you down? What silver linings have you found? Much love!

r.

Weekly Musings #3: volunteering and spotify addiction addition

I know I usually do these on Fridays but this has been a pretty hectic week/weekend so I had to push it off until I had some time to myself. I'm in the two weeks of midterm exams here at uni so things have been more than a little rushed and overwhelming the past few days, so taking a break with some tea and catching up on posts is just a good way to decompress for me.
So, without further ado!

Volunteering: A couple of weeks ago, I sent in my application to volunteer at the Women's Resource Center on campus and I sat an interview and got selected! It's been a whirl-wind of getting familiar with my duties and such but it's essentially a really amazing group of feminist ladies providing a safe space, information & resources and peer support as well as a bunch of other things to the campus.
I really struggled my first year meeting like minded people and it is beyond lovely to be able to hold conversations with like minded women and take part in organizing events that are relevant to the beliefs I hold strongly. It's just been excellent for: my sense of self and mental health.

Spotify addiction: Not quite as intrinsicly meaningful as aforementioned volunteering but still something that's been making me über happy. Living in Canada, Spotify isn't a huge thing here but J got an early invitation and of course, sent me an e-mail invitation so I could peruse the amazing music libraries and playlists. I've always been a fan of music platforms like this (re: 8tracks), and it's definitely way more efficient and streamlined and has been treating me to an abundance of new songs and artists, which, is really what I'm happy about because music is so important to me and how I feel.

honorable mentions:

• Night Vale • baby biceps forming (!) • acai tea • weather finally being cool enough for scarves and boots • lovely messages from people on tumblr • vigorous debate • calls from my dad • baked goods • post run feelings • buying new school supplies • chatting with lovely girls at my bus stop • warm laundry from the dryer • collecting pins for my school bag • awaiting stuff coming in the mail • sleep overs with J • mexican food dates • massages • bright fall days • happy dogs • cross words • holding hands • finally being over my ridiculous head cold • good hair days • smiling at strangers •philosophy class  • helpful, kind customer service workers

link love:• Michelle's TilT for all things fall related - I am so here for this.
• I am so in love with the photo's Amy share of her beautiful King's College dorm.
• The Beauty Department serves it up again with this hella cool upside down cat eye makeup look.
• The Pomodoro Technique for studying is proving super effective for any other students out there!
• This stunning botanical illustration; I wish I had a hundred of these for my room. • This snarky comic totally firing some shots on this pertinent issues.

So darlin's, what made this week wonderful for you? (p.s. all photo are indeed mine)
r.

Reflection on September Goals

photo credits to: tumblr/respective photographer

Hello all! I honestly can't believe October has come around this fast - it always seems to slip my mind how fast the time goes when you're back on a semester-ized schedule. So It's time to reflect on the goals I had set for September!

1. Make time for reading
I failed horribly at this one, not going to lie. The first week I found I had the time but then my workload started getting a little more intensive and on top of trying to balance volunteering and such it slipped as a priority.
And, admittedly I've been conditioning myself to fall asleep to Netflix rather than using that time for reading, I'm ashamed to say. So that will definitely be a goal I carry into October.

2. Get to the gym on the regular 
I was doing pretty darn good with this one (baby biceps are growing folks!) until I got hit down with this absolutely horrendous head/chest cold that I'm only just getting over. I know it's some people's philosophy to push through and go to the gym regardless but I find that just hinders my healing process and I feel like a bag of crap and can't focus on my work or whatnot. But now that I'm on the flip side of better I'm carrying this over into October (ties in neatly with #teamnocheats) and hopefully make some more running and muscle progress.

3. Get organized and stay that way 

Surprisingly I did good on this one. Once I got all my respective syllabuses for all my classes, I transferred over all my relevant dates immediately, invested in a Moleskin and grabbed a daily planner from the student offices on camps and made writing all important dates and "things-to-remember" into those as soon as my professors mentioned it in class. As well I've been excellent at copying over my notes and hole-punching everything and making sure my study space is always clean and I can easily say this has contributed to my peace of mind hugely.

5. Be more aware of my spending 

Yes indeed folks, even after buying textbooks, weekly groceries, study supplies, new shoes, bus passes and such my bank statement still looks good. I posted about my views on alcohol earlier this month and ultimately decided that drinking is something I wanted to give up for a little while and just generally avoiding impulses purchases has kept me (for now) at a good place financially. in my view it's worth it to sacrifice some social events for my peace of mind of finances just in case something happens that requires a big chunk of change.

6. Document more 

I failed miserably at keeping regular diary entries but in terms of photography I've been excellent at capturing my first month back on campus via pictures. As I predicted it's been a good way to make me really look to find beauty in my every day goings on and I really appreciate past Rachel for considering this. Being able to look back at my scenic campus shots, selfies, and shots from my neighborhood makes me grateful for the opportunities and things I do have in my life.

So, that's all folks! I think I did pretty good personally - October Resolutions will be up soon and a weekly reflection! 

Have any goals for your September; how did they go?
r.